Best jokes/pick up lines :P

Post your best jokes or pick up lines. See which ones the best!

Hey wanna play UNO with me? Oh wait nvm... your gonna steal all the green cards. xD

So there's a guy on the bus who has a real urge to fart, the music is really loud so he decides to fart to the beat of the music. When he gets off the bus, everyone is staring at him like a weirdo and he soon realizes that he was listening to his Ipod.

If I were a stoplight, I would turn red just to stare at you longer... o.~

Ba da ba ba ba I'm lovin' it. Randomness

Lol. These two were used on me.
"I need help. I have 2 movie tickets, but nobody to go with. Can u please help?"

And

"you look pretty hot. You should come over, my house has ac and a ton of fans, to cool you off"

sarah! u finally made an account lolz

All thanks to me >.> lol

How you doin? (Joey from friends style)