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Alpha Prism's Haypi Prologue

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AlphaPrism

Newbie

Posts: 6

Joined: Wed May 26, 2010 1:02 pm

Post Tue Jan 11, 2011 1:22 am

Alpha Prism's Haypi Prologue

The young man sat in silence. His home was dusty, his chair was rickety, and his demeanor was hopeless. Tomorrow his house would go up on sale - he could not pay his debts. His family had cursed and abandoned him to the ends of the earth, and he had not heard from them in six months. His true love had scorned him and sent him away from her dwelling, commanding him never to see her again.

A knock at the door scarcely roused this young man, so steeped in his misfortune was he. It was only when the knock came again, more insistent and louder, that he came to life and stood up to greet his visitor. He walked to the door and opened it slowly.

There stood an ancient man, weathered and sculpted by time. Lines upon lines creased his forehead. White hair bushed from under his hat, and a long grey beard fell from his chin. His eyes, staring out from under his eyebrows, immediately fell upon his unfortunate host.

"Greetings, sir," the young man said. "What is it that I may do for you this evening?"

The old man entered through the door, as the young man took his hat and coat and hung them on a rack. "Please be seated," the young man said fervently; he smiled gratefully and sat down on the only other chair in the house.

"I've heard of your misfortune," the old one began, leaning forward as though with a business proposition. "Your home is going up for auction tomorrow, is it not?"

"Yes, and it will just barely pay all my debts," the young man replied. "Then I have nothing left in the world."

"Not so. Have you heard tell of the Haypi Relics?"

"Heard of, but they are lost to time. No one will ever find them."

"Not true. A seaman was washed up the other night, saying he had found the Relics, but could not retrieve any of them. The King is now offering a reward to anyone who finds all eight of them."

"It's a desperate mission."

"But if you succeed, fame and fortune await you. Who knows? Some have told me that if you find all eight of the Relics and place them together, you shall receive a Key to the future. And your family will forgive you, your true love accept you."

The young man was won over by these words. "I shall do this," he said at last. "But who knows whether I might survive?"

~~~~~~~~~~~

The next evening, he walked down the boulevard to the dock where his new ship was moored. His house had been sold and all that he had in the world now was this ship. He leaped onto the boat and cast off. A fine wind picked up and blew his hair back, as he stood up and faced into the setting sun. Now there was no turning back. The Adventure of Haypi had begun.
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AlphaPrism

Newbie

Posts: 6

Joined: Wed May 26, 2010 1:02 pm

Post Tue Jan 11, 2011 1:27 am

Re: Alpha Prism's Haypi Prologue

If you guys want this shorter, I can edit and make a new shorter version.
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Foreigner

Beginner

Posts: 41

Joined: Fri Dec 31, 2010 5:07 pm

Post Tue Jan 11, 2011 1:12 pm

Re: Alpha Prism's Haypi Prologue

I think this is a good length. I'd rate this as a 9/10!
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beatlesfan

Marquis

Posts: 436

Joined: Thu May 06, 2010 12:17 am

Post Tue Jan 11, 2011 3:03 pm

Re: Alpha Prism's Haypi Prologue

This is very good, i would give it a 9 out of 10 as well
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