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Solong entry #2 first draft

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Solong

Newbie

Posts: 18

Joined: Sat Aug 14, 2010 10:25 pm

Post Sat Jan 01, 2011 5:04 pm

Solong entry #2 first draft

There are legends of a king who had an incomparable amount of treasure along with 8 priceless relics. One day he realized that his only son was not fit for taking his throne and watching over his treasure. The evil king told his servant to send 8 ships in different directions that would sail for 5 years without stopping with a different relic in each ship. The captain of one of these ships had recently had a baby, so he brought along his wife and child on the 7 year voyage. Little did he know that the king planned on sinking each of his ships so that his son would not have it and the priceless relics would be out of his hands. On the third year of the voyage, one of the ships saw a boat in the horizon that was gaining fast, when it reached them the captain had stuck his 4 year old in a barrel and thrown him overboard with a hastily written note because he knew this would be the end. The small child never had to see his father's ship get blown to pieces, and it never saw daylight until the third day when the child washed up on the shores of Haypi. A nice family found the child on the beach and took the child in as their own and the child grew up to be 18 there. On the childs eighteenth birthday it was given the 14 year old note that its father had written,
"My child, I had to do what i did because our lives were in imminent danger and I could only save you. The king that I worked for is going to sink his own ship and when you get this, you need to find those 8 treasures before someone else does, for when you do, the future will open up to you." 
And so from that day forward his childs' only goal was to find those 8 relics and avenge its fathers death. On the childs' nineteenth birthday, it's foster parents used almost all of their money to buy their child a ship and submarine so that it could pursue his dream. Your journey starts here.
Last edited by Solong on Sat Jan 15, 2011 3:57 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Caladan

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Posts: 629

Joined: Wed May 12, 2010 6:34 pm

Location: At, or nowhere near my computer

Post Sat Jan 01, 2011 11:19 pm

Re: Solong entry #2 first draft

Great background story for the player. It could be pretty easy to make this one not sexually biased by replacing "he" with "the child."
Beware the Artesians!!
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Solong

Newbie

Posts: 18

Joined: Sat Aug 14, 2010 10:25 pm

Post Sat Jan 01, 2011 11:24 pm

Re: Solong entry #2 first draft

Thanks, I'll fix that soon
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Solong

Newbie

Posts: 18

Joined: Sat Aug 14, 2010 10:25 pm

Post Mon Jan 03, 2011 12:30 am

Re: Solong entry #2 first draft

Any feedback would be much appreciated. If you could please rate x/10 that would be great

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